Reflections

It is that time of the year again. Christmas, holidays, family, parties, the end of a year and ushering in a new year.

I have never been one to do new year's resolutions. At a point in time 31 December, was not so much of a marker for me. I felt that it was really just another day, another social construct. I could just as easily choose 14th August to celebrate the end of the year. And we know that Jesus was not actually born on 25th December. But over time, I have come to realise that at various points in the bible, God places emphasis on particular days, months, seasons and festivals. This could be for remembrance of a significant event, for rest, for celebration or even for mourning. As friends, families, and communities, it is always good to celebrate or remember together, and most cultures have special times of commemoration.

What I have come to know about myself, is that I am prone to forget. I think most of us are. And so I have grown to appreciate this season and use it as an opportunity to remember and celebrate the year.

In the last few days of the calendar year, I like to get myself away from the routine of everyday life, make some space (most times this is by the ocean), and reflect on the steps that have been taken within the year (however small), and celebrate this.

For a great many of us, 2020 has been a memorable year. The year when a global pandemic hit, and life as we know it changed. There has been much uncertainty, there has been loss and there has been grief. Many around the world have been restricted in one way or the other in their daily movement, work, leisure and travel arrangements.

We know this, but we have been reminded ever so vividly this year, that we can make our plans and set our goals but all we really have is this moment. I can hope, I can dream, I can wish, but I really do not know what what tomorrow holds. I do not even know what the next hour or minute holds.

How do we not fall into despair knowing this? What gives you strength to keep going? What do you have control over and what is out of your control?

I can say that for me, what continually gives me a hope for tomorrow is a faith in God who holds tomorrow, the future and eternity. A trust in the one who knows, even as I don't. A belief that no matter what comes, he is with me (even through the fire and the storm). This year I have had an ever deeper knowledge of the phrase Deo volente (God willing). In the bible, James puts it this way:

" Come now, you who say, “Today or tomorrow we will go into such and such a town and spend a year there and trade and make a profit”— yet you do not know what tomorrow will bring. What is your life? For you are a mist that appears for a little time and then vanishes. Instead you ought to say, “If the Lord wills, we will live and do this or that.” James 4:13-15".

In approaching God as a father, I also believe that he has the best in store for his children, as a father on earth would do:

"As a father shows compassion to his children, so the Lord shows compassion to those who fear (believe in) him. Psalm 103:13".

And yet I would say that in spite of this, and many promises in the word that I hold on to, this has been the year where I feel my faith has been tested to its core. This has been because of various situations that people close to me have faced: illness, bereavement and loss. I have asked why, I have prayed, I have wept and I have been angry. There certainly have been times of lament.

It can be easy to feel stuck. And yet as I take a step back and reflect on my musings over the year, I see that good things did happen, there have been answers to prayers. A friend giving birth to the most beautiful baby girl after a number of challenges, a survivor of trafficking finding good stable work after so many months of searching, friends recovering from COVID, friends who have encouraged and inspired me in my lowest moments, and the joy of my brother getting married. There have been successes, there has been joy, laughter, and health.

I see that sometimes, it is you and I, who are to be the change, to bring light and encouragement to those around us.

Sometimes, it is you who needs to pray to bring change into a particular situation.

It is easy to forget.

It is easy to be overwhelmed with what lays ahead.

As you move ahead, take time to write down your challenges, your heartaches and your prayers.

Take time to record victories, times of joy, things you are grateful for, and answers to prayers.

Take time to stop, pause, take a deep breath and remember what has changed, the steps you have taken.

As you reflect, make a memorial. Celebrate, mourn, heal and through this have hope.

A friend recently asked me to describe 2020 in a word! I thought about for a few moments and said: "Pivotal". Because for me, although a lot was put on hold and a lot changed, I believe I was able to set the foundations for new beginnings in various areas of my life (this blog being one :) )

We may not know what 2021 holds, but we know that faith, hope and love remain always:

"So now faith, hope, and love abide, these three; but the greatest of these is love 1 Corinthians 13:13".

Wishing you and your loved ones all the very best for 2021.